i will catch my tears in a vile
        pour them into my pen
                and write my life story
                        in black and blue tears

dysphoric cries don’t tell lies
        they’d rather remember euphoria
                but the ink-tears are too black
                        too dark with history of lonely nights
                                in a house filled with voices

the voices are ghosts with flesh
        i am flesh turned ghost
                the mirror fades my reflection
                        i am disappeared into paper and ink

water fills the bathroom sink
        my tears blacken the water
                the white paper falls in and melts
                        but the words of my story remain

the voices call to me
        i hear them
                but the ink-tears form words
                        they contend for my time

but time died next to my soul
        it bleeds onto the carpet

                the words now write themselves on paper
                        in ink-tears
                                in pain too bitter to drink

© zaji, 2016

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