Today is day five of my juice fast. It was a much better day than day three and four. I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I made it through without much fuss. I didn’t feel hungry for solid food while I was out and about, but instead kept looking around for a juice place. I feel good and hope to make it to day six. The day is almost over, so I’m well on my way.
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Sexy is intelligence wrapped around a deep sense of knowing. Sexy is being humble, while still exuding confidence in what you know to be true. Sexy is being open to learning and growing. Sexy is being fully clothed in the dead of winter and still being able to turn heads. That’s because sexy is in the spirit. It isn’t about the body. It’s about your soul pheromones. It’s about giving off that soul scent that follows you everywhere you go. And even though it doesn’t have a smell, when folks see you they move closer, and still inhale with their eyes closed. It’s about making even a straight woman look at you and say, “Damn, if I wasn’t straight I’d…” Sexy is sitting in a room reading a book and your man is turned on by that. Why? Because even in silence, your sexy shines through. Because in silence and meditation is where you found your sexy. And sisters, you ain’t giving it back.
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It has been over a year since I’ve done a juice fast. I started again, finally, on Monday. Today is day four. The first day was tough. When you are accustomed to eating, drinking your nutrients isn’t very satisfying. The second day was easy. Day three, yesterday, was a beast. My stomach was craving food even though my mind had no desire. It squeezed me for the entire day, crying out for even the smallest morsel. Today is much better. I felt a little tired and later realized that I was low in iron. I quickly juiced myself some iron rich plants and felt better immediately. So far, so good. I feel fine and am hoping to make it to day five. *crossing fingers*
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Last night I dreamed about being genuine. It was an indirect dream that made me realize that I might have some fear of being my complete genuine self. I have so many dimensions and realize that there will be parts of who I am that many may not like. In the dream, I teetered on the edge of caring and not caring. If I allow all 360 degrees of me to be seen, what will I lose? But in turn, what will I gain? In all the areas of my life that I allow myself to be seen, I am 100% genuine. But I wonder, if I don’t show the other parts of me, my other thoughts, my other emotions, am I fully genuine? Am I living a wholly truthful life? Or do we all hold a piece of us back? Pieces we don’t want anyone to see for fear of being judged. Or simply because we believe not everyone should know our deepest thoughts. Aren’t we all guilty of not being 360 degrees of genuine? The dream gave me pause and has prompted me to reevaluate myself in greater detail.
Maybe like everyone else, I should tuck away parts of me that no one can ever see. But something inside me says that may be the truth of other people’s lives and way of living, but that is not my truth. It is as though my need to be 360 degrees of transparent is my life line. As I ponder this dream, I will meditate on who I am and what I need to feel genuine, whole and truthful. It is different for each of us. Many survive best when they hold back pieces of their being–the things they think and feel. While others need to speak their truth,… Continue reading