a joy
It is such a joy to be back on my mac. isn’t she sexy? yes yes, she’s a little aged, but sexy still…wrinkles and all.
What? You’re expecting me to say more?
No no. Leave me with my shallow moment. We all need it sometimes.
out of sorts
I have realized that I REALLY love my Mac. I have been away from my computer for a week now and unable to do the things I need to do efficiently. I am forced to use a library computer or another computer that is not mine. I feel so out of sorts.
Not only do I love my Mac, I also realize how much more efficient it is. The PC I am on cannot do half the things my Mac can. The dexterity is lacking and the quality wanting. This is partly the reason I have not been posting more regularly. I can’t upload videos, audio or do much of anything from this computer. This weekend I will be back on my Mac. Can’t wait.
I am hoping in the near future I can get a Mac laptop. The joy of mobility. I’ll keep you posted on that development.
Well, back to being quasi busy.
quote: something always happening
Something is always happening.
But when it happens, people don’t always see it,
or understand it, or accept it.” Â
- Fallen, movie
lovin' and livin'
This right here is my sweetie. That’s us.  :: big grin::
Thought I’d post us lovin’ each other up.
Maverick is a wonderful man whom I’ve known for some time now. We were long distant friends by phone for a couple years.  Over time, something developed.
We go everywhere together now. I have met just about all his friends. Have met (son) and spoken to (daughter) two of his children and have met most of his co-workers at his job in Indiana.
He has a lovely home and a very interesting town. However, we enjoy spending most of our time together in Pennsylvania, where I live. He is with me there virtually every weekend, and during the week we are on the phone practically all day. And I’m not a big phone person.
He’s met nearly all my friends and has enjoyed a wonderful week with me in Florida with my mother and sister.  He’s met my daughters and they seem to approve. He thinks they are amazing young ladies.
What I cherish most about our relationship is we talk about EVERYTHING. And I mean EVERYTHING. He knows about ALL my past, including past boyfriends, my ex-husband, and a man I was seeing after my ex-husband. Sadly, that didn’t work out. Great man whom I will always love dearly; but life sometimes gets in the way of love.  Magically, however, where one door closes another opens. Maverick was that open door, a new love more ready than the old. And more suited for who I am. He knows my entire life practically, and the trials I’ve been through. Well, I don’t think I told him about that time when at about 13 years old I tried to steal a mini  stapler from a store cause I wanted it something fierce. :: blinking :: Kids. Aren’t we just bad sometimes? I was terrified. It never happened again.
I particularly enjoy the fact that he reads. He even reads me to sleep. It is a wonderful thing to be with someone so filled with knowledge. So far, we seem to be really good together and immensly enjoy each other’s company. Overall, we complement each other.
We’re pretty happy. And can we laugh together? Oh my goodness. We enjoy side splitting laughter almost daily. What makes us work so well is the fact that we both have very much the same views about the world, while still challenging each other in areas most important. We don’t always agree, but that is what makes us a stronger couple. Even more, we respect each other deeply. I have such a deep admiration for this man, it is amazing.
Top of the list for me, is he is not a man interested in the machinations of the world. And like me, has NO (zero) interest whatsoever in the world’s notions, including marriage, least of all the eurocentric ideals and talismans around marriage. We have no interest in marriage through the courts or churches of this world. We believe that our relationship needs only the approval of us and those we love and respect.  We do not need strangers to confirm our union of love, and certainly we don’t need their silly paperwork that only gives them power over our lives. Had I stuck with my instincts many years ago, I would have NEVER gotten married through their methods. And this has nothing to do with the person I was married to. It simply has to do with principle and not giving into a group of strangers who try at every turn to control our lives, even in matters private. With that written, I don’t give a hell about marriage, nor what anyone believes about that little piece of paper. Whomever wishes to believe it has power, or give it emotional power because they feel it binds two people, that is their business. I respect their choices, albeit not for me. I will not allow it to rule me in any arena of my life. And my only hope is that I am not one day forced by these bullies to participate in a thing I am strongly opposed to and feel should be left between myself and the soul I bond with.
On this, Maverick and I agree. And any bonding we do, will NOT be amidst the world of laws, courts and churches, but privately, amongst friends and family of our chosing. We will write our own words, and design our own cermony, all within the walls of our home. In our estimation, the universe is our only law, and our spirit is the only confirmation of our bond. No divorce court can break us asunder, only we can do that. And no marriage paper made of wood or cotton or law can make us one in body, mind and soul. Only we can do that, and that we have done.
But I digress.
My sweetie knows that I have many friends, male and female. He knows that I grew up a tomboy, so I am able to chat with the boys just as easily as I can chat with the girls. He is always amused by the guy stories I am not supposed to know. :: chuckling :: To all my guy friends out there, I won’t tell. All the dirty little stories you tell me about sisters is safe with me. :: devilish laugh :: Moreover, he is not intimidated by the presence of others in my life because he knows who they are and their roles. He trusts me and I trust him. We know that we are not the owner of the other’s spirit. And through that respect, we allow each other room to grow and breathe, while still knowing that we want only each other.
Anyhoo, Mav, you’re amazing. Thank you for seeing all my flaws and still loving me for who I am, flaws and all. I equally love you, flaws and all. Also, thanks for saving me. Had you not rescued me, I might have given up hope. The universe knew to send you. You were right on time. My life has been amazing since you’ve come along. All I can say is, wow!
My life is an open book for him.  But as we both agree, we have no time to waste on the past. We are who we are now because we have learned from the past. We don’t spend our lives living in the past. Every fire we have come through teaches us something new.
Good, bad or indifferent, everything I’ve been, has taught me something and brought me to a new level of awareness. As an imperfect spirit, do I still have much to learn about life? Yes, of course. I will make many more mistakes on my life journey.  And that is because I do not know all. And will never know all. I can only hope to do my best, and be better than I was yesterday. As it is with most humans. There are some mistakes I will never make. And someone else will make it, and vice versa. So it goes in the universe. We learn and grow from everything. Maverick and I have learned and grown through our personal struggles.
What I’ve learned is to not be bitter about things of the past. We are all children of the universe. The sooner we realize that, the better off we’ll be, and the easier it will be for us to move on, forgive and live our lives…without being hampered by things we cannot change. Mav and I have realized this. It is what brought us together…that keen recognition. Something only maturity and wisdom can bring.
Thank you Maverick for loving me. I love you right back. Mwah!!
reading: survivor by octavia butler
today is a good day to read. the sun is shining and the sky here is cloudless. i am finishing up an anthology and will soon start on Survivor by Octavia Butler. the sister is a fierce writer with fierce ideas. she unfolds the social issues of our time in a way that speaks truth to power.
i can only hope to one day write as fiercly as her. may she rest in peace and continue to write in the realm where she now resides.
